To My Future Children.....

Hi dear children,

If you ever come across this, you will hold this as proof that your mom.... the same mom that you think is boring and too uptight.... once got very, very drunk. Your mom who is always reminding you of how alcoholism runs in the family and how you do not have to drink to have fun.....  once was THAT girl who had to be half-carried out of an amphitheater after a Luke Bryan concert

See, I'm not exactly proud of this fact, but I accept that it happens and it was totally my choice. I knew in my head it was a stupid thing to do and I did it anyway. I... who ALWAYS knew when to cut myself off and how to sober myself up with bread and water.... didn't. 

I hope that it makes me a little more relatable.

Yes, I was 30 before this happened. Yes, I am swearing that it will never happen again. Yes, I realize that I was right when I said that throwing up is just not worth it.

But, I'm still hoping that, if nothing else, this one experience will help me help you.

Here are some absolute truths..........

- I was 30 and was legally able to purchase the (insert #) alcoholic beverages that I did. If you are not 21, then nothing I am saying here applies. The law is the law. I followed it and so should you.

- It will be fun. In fact, it will probably be more fun than you have ever had.

- The crappy week you've had? The boss that made work hell? The boy or girl that broke your heart? All of the above? You will 100% forget them with all the fun you are having.

- Then, eventually, you will take that one drink that pushes it into "not fun." If you are anything like your mom, you will then start crying and going on about all the sadness you are feeling.

- The concert will end and your friends/family will have to figure out how to get you out of your seat and to the car. They will hopefully think ahead to the ride home and prepare for the inevitable sick that you are going to be.

- Remember the Teacups at Disney? How you liked to spin as fast as I could make it go? How by the end of the two minute ride, you were ready for it to end even though it was our favorite ride? Now, think about that and imagine spinning at full speed for the entire hour long car ride home. That is what it will feel like. It will feel like death.

- Once the car stops, those same people that got you in will have to figure out how to get you out and into the house. They will pat your back and try to make your drink water and make sure you are breathing. They will somehow be comforted by the fact that you probably got rid of all the stuff in your stomach.

- Then, you will wake up the next day. Not feeling great.... but, if you are like your mom, not really feeling hungover. Just tired and worn out.

- You will realize when you wake up that you had fun before that last drink. That you really did. That you survived it and probably would still be considered a bore by some standards.

And, here are the most important truths........

You will realize that NO one person or thing is worth feeling as bad as you did when the bad came. No job. No boss. No boy. No girl. No friend. None of them are worth it.

You will realize that the bad is still there, but it is a little less important. It doesn't consume you and it doesn't define you. Yes, you still have to deal with the bad, but after spending a night feeling like death, it really isn't so bad to deal with the bad, anymore. 

You will pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and chalk it up to a really bad month/week/day that has ended, never to be relived. You will realize who loves you and supports you.... and that they are the ones you should be focusing on.