Growing up, I've always been taught and known that the Lord knows everything about us....... nothing catches Him by surprise.
I know this.
I have a hard time dealing with it, sometimes.
There are things I want in life...... mainly love and to be loved the way it's supposed to be. And, I know that when it's right and supposed to happen, if it's supposed to happen, it will.
Right now, though, I'm struggling with being told that if I were doing it differently, it would have happened by now. Or, it will happen sooner if I just do something other than what I am doing now.
Part of me thinks that could be true and doubts everything I think and feel, currently. I mean, it shouldn't be this hard, right?
The other part of me thinks that it's easy to say that when you've found it, already. And, all my doubts are coming from other people's words. So, is it God trying to warn me or Satan trying to discourage me?
Most of the time, I just go about my own life. Just doing the best I can to live well and live full. I can't really do anything about what another person wants or doesn't want. So, I just take the good when I get it and do my best to be content with my life when I don't get it.
Then, someone will say something. Or, ask something. And, it can throw me for a loop. Because, I don't know all the answers. And, I go back and forth between telling myself to make a drastic change and telling myself to just stay still.