Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Be Fearless and Speak Now

I make no bones about the fact that I am a huge fan of Taylor Swift. More than her singing or performances, I greatly admire her way with words. I wish I was able to put pen to paper like she does.
She gets a lot of flack for being to immature or bubblegum, but I personally think her teenage self was brilliant at taking feelings and thoughts that we all have had at some point and expressing them in a thought-provoking way.
Her last two albums were titled 'Fearless' and 'Speak Now.' Oddly enough, they flow well into one another, don't you think? It takes some courage to speak your mind. To speak your heart.
In her words............ (Fearless)......
To me, Fearless is having fears. Fearless is having doubts. Lots of them. To me, Fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. Fearless is falling madly in love even though you've been hurt before....... Fearless is to fall for your best friend, even though he's in love with someone else..... I think loving despite what some people think is Fearless. I think allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor is Fearless. Letting go is Fearless. Then moving on and being alright, that's Fearless, too. But no matter what love throws at you, you have to believe in it. You have to believe in love stories and prince charmings and happily ever after. That's why I write these songs. Because I think love is Fearless.

And, Speak Now....

'Speak now or forever hold your peace,' the words said by preachers at the end of wedding ceremonies all over the world, right before the vows. It's a last chance for protest, a moment that makes everyone's heart race, and a moment I've always been strangely fascinated by. So many fantasize about bursting into a church, saying what they'd kept inside for years like in the movies. In real life, it rarely happens.

Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I've begun to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything.

I think most of us fear reaching the end of our life, and looking back regretting the moments we didn't speak up. When we didn't say 'I love you.' When we should've said 'I'm sorry.' When we didn't stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help.

These songs are made up of words I didn't say when the moment was right in front of me. These songs are open letters. Each is written with a specific person in mind, telling them what I meant to tell them in person. To the beautiful boy whose heart I broke in December. To my first love who I never thought would be my first heartbreak. To my band. To a mean man I used to be afraid of. To someone who made my world very dark for a while. To a girl who stole something of mine. To someone I forgive for what he said in front of the whole world.

I've said all of that (with Ms. Swift's help) to say that over the past month or so (and even more in the past week), I've been building up some courage. I've decided to be a bit fearless.... at the risk of being rejected. I've practiced in my mind some things I need to say and I pray that when the time comes to speak, the right words will come to me.

Hopefully, I'll be able to elaborate on all of this later in the week. 

In the meantime, if you could send up a few prayers for me.... for peace, for clarity, and for courage.


Melissa said...

I'm not a huge fan of hers but i have always thought she's a good writer & has a good head on her shoulers!

I will be praying of you/thinking of you! :)

Melissa said...

praying FOR you, that is! :)

LWLH said...

Sending your prayers your way tootz! :)

Mrs. Monologues said...

Her music isn't my favorite, but I still listen to all of her songs because she is fantastic with lyrics. Musical poetry at it's finest.

Hoping you find your strength.