I just got back from another amazing trip to St. Jude. Expect a recap of the weekend, sometime this week.
Every time I come back from the trip, I come back with a renewed look on life. It usually lasts until just after our Radiothon. It is a feeling that I wish I could make last the rest of the 11 months of the year.
Generally speaking, I am pretty conservative. I try to be polite and considerate. I tend to play things safely.
I don't always speak my mind because I don't want to hurt anyone.
I don't act because I don't want to regret.
Then, I meet these kids. These amazing, beautiful kids. That are facing so much. That have so much hope.... so much LIFE.
And, I want to kick myself.
This weekend, I listened to the story of Marcus Luttrell. He is the lone survivor of Operation Redwing. He listened to his best friend in the entire world be killed and couldn't do anything about it. He faced members of the Taliban by himself. He crawled 7 miles while most of his major bones were broken to find some semblance of safety. He lives with the realization that 16 other people on his team died.... and that multiple others died trying to rescue him. Then, he got well and went out to protect our country again. The man had a room of over 1000 people completely spellbound for 90 minutes.
I heard his story and I met these kids.... and, I get so mad at myself for taking my own healthy, safe life for granted. I get so mad for worrying so much that I don't speak up.
So, I tend to use this month or so to take the bull by the horns. Even if it's fleeting, I try to make the most of my "newfound" (or regained) attitude.
As I did a couple years ago, I am taking this opportunity to take some scary steps.
Wish me luck, please.